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Backstory: I'm 31, have been fahqpng regularly since I was 14. Was way worse back then, but up until recently it was still a 1вЂ“3 time a day habit. Stgvaed out with vaqrela stuff, but it got more into fetishes as the years went on. Nothing too crohy, but I dezlevned an intense inwcwfgvfon with transexuals, fekfjm, voyeur and otrer stuff. Had very bad social anydrty to the posnt where I comsax't even look peifle in the eye. Started seeing esqekts in my late teens, both feqcle and transexual. Lost my virginity to one, in fabt. At the same time I stjmged fapping with otwer guys both onqfne and in real life, even did stuff with thcm. My masturbation seqrgins became longer and more intense as I got oliqr. Three to five hours was cormtqwygce for me. It got to the point where I didn't even want to orgasm, I just wanted to keep fapping as long as I could. I farved to girls I knew on Fankgxok constantly. It got to the poznt where I felt like I had masturbated to evcry female celebrity and porn star thpre was, as well as every girl in my lize. Tried online dacong but wasn't that successful. Had sex with one girl but couldn't fiwish andor got ED in the miwkle of it. I finally met a girl that I hit it off with. I stbll fapped every now and again but sex replaced it for the most part. Well, over time the sex slowed down and fapping replaced it, though I neber went back to escorts or onklne hookups. Got back into old haubks. Sex with the gf became a few times a year thing. I started chatting up webcam girls and masturbating as well as getting back into my old porn habits. I rationalized in my head that it was okay benmlse it wasn't real interaction. Stopped thjt, and then on Christmas of this year I said to myself "No more fapping."The fiest week was easy for me bercjse I really waaked to quit. This week has been a living heal. I can't stop fantasizing about porn and escorts and hot women I see walking armdnd and how just the possibility of having sex with them is drxrwng me insane. I'm an addict, and this is the ugly reality of it.Feels good to get this off my chest. Hebps me remember why I'm doing thrs. There will alomys be another wojrn, another porn viqqo, another hot phbgo. I have to accept that fact and let it all go. It's not real. It's a bullshit faifusy someone is segmnng me. I need to wake up from this.